Random Possible Messages

Possible Message

 (1-29-10)

 Well, a long time ago it was almost a possible message anyway. I came across a really old PM from someone, which I never posted on my site. It isn't a biggie, but since it's Patrick-related, here it is: 

Patrick is your resident ghost/spirit, right? I had a dream recently and the name Patrick was said to me very clearly and I've been trying to figure out who Patrick was, and where I had heard of Patrick before.

I think this might be the same Patrick. I don't even know what the dream was about now. I just remember the name very clearly. Very interesting!

A Reading:

Someone wanted to practice their reading skills, so one day I finally volunteered. They got the name of my lead character of my book right: Emily. Some things were a little off, but for the most part they were bang on and I don't think I even had my website listed on that forum, so she couldn't have gotten the information there. (I think I had it listed for a while, but later took it off). 

The only thing that confuses me is the time period she said Patrick came from. She also made it sound like Patrick was just a guardian... which he probably is but then what of the other readings and all those coincidences and synchronicities and dreams? 

She also mentioned his children, which my aunt even spoke of. 

Here's part of her reading: 

His name was "Patrick." A childhood guardian. :) Nothing to fear at all. He is nothing to fear. 

When I ask my guide, I hear he is an ancestor on your father's side. He hasn't moved on and is the type of spirit that tends to hang around and observe. His plane of existence is like a veil between you and him. He is on one side and you the other. He is close to the veil, where some spirits move on to other planes of existence. Other people have their theories, but this is mine. :) 

Please come back if you find out more. I keep thinking Patrick is from the civil war era. He lost his children... this is what I am getting. Hmm.

 

Tarot Reading:

After speaking to a woman who did a tarot card reading on me (this was on a Gerry Butler website if you can believe that) which was just a general reading but ended up being about Patrick and the mystery more or less being at sort of an end, I mentioned my ’Target’ dream (posted on this website) to her just in passing. Well, when checking my email a few minutes later there was a Target ad flashing at the top of the screen. 

By the way, her reading mentioned --- “It looks like you are making a decision to leave something behind... looks like it will be over finally, and it looks like it involves a man. This is a huge decision and it has spiritual overtones to it.” 

I now figure the Target ad came up just because the computer 'read' it in my email.  I forget how those 'spying' ads work these days.  Too bad.

She also drew the King of Swords, which is a card Patrick showed my friend a few months later. (I’ve always seen that as confirmation that his personality is like the King of Swords).

 

Reminder to Self:

I just really feel the need to be reminded of this every once in a while. It's a very wise message someone (a very sweet lady author whom shall remain nameless for privacy's sake) shared with me a while back. Seriously, I need to tape this to my bathroom mirror or something.

Ok. Deep breath here. I have a message for you and unless I buck up my courage and send it off, I'm going to keep getting this buzzing little nudges from my Guide, and I'm not going to get any work done that way. Please don't think I'm crazy. LOL. I'm so not used to doing this. 

I'm supposed to tell you that there are no coincidences. That everything that you notice and stumble across and experience is there for a reason, and that reason is to make you see. To understand. Your Patrick... he is there watching over you, yes, but you aren't to focus on the bittersweet knowledge that he hasn't come back for you. You are analytical and you doubt by nature {as do I, but I'm getting better about this}, and yet you are deeply intuitive but keep downplaying that part of yourself, and you need to stop. You need to get past that skepticism and go with what you feel, what you know deep inside. The world will make more sense to you if you do. You don't need a medium to understand. The truth is there inside you. You need to feel, to know, to **BELIEVE**, and you will have the answers that you seek. 

Society tells us none of this exists, and yet those of us who have a deeper connection... we have been given this glimpse into eternity for a reason. Don't squander it with doubt. Feel. Believe. And know the truth.

Also, have you written a manuscript surrounding Patrick? I get the feeling that if you do so, much of the truth will come out.

 P.S. I believe you are astral traveling through your dreams at times.

 ~*~*~*~*~

And this is in response to my reply: 

Maybe... just maybe... the next time that you recognize yourself brushing something off as coincidence, you can purposely set that doubt aside, just for the moment, and acknowledge the thought/feeling/vision. Just say, "Hello, I see you. Thank you." Acknowledge it, file it away... but don't dismiss it as nothing. Just try to stay open to the possibility. I also wonder if Patrick isn't acting more as a spirit guide for you in this lifetime. He seems to be doing his darnedest to get your attention and to help you to see and believe in him, but also to just believe in general. His spirit doesn't seem to be coming through to contact you solely to remind you of your past relationship with him {for what would be the point? If he had truly learned everything he had to learn, enough not to reincarnate, he would have evolved past the earthly concerns. He must have a larger purpose than that...}

I believe in twin flames, and in soul mates. In fact, I feel that I have one that I have remembered but am not with currently as well... and I think that idea would probably upset my husband. But then, we have other things that have tied us to each other. I probably sound very accepting of this... but it's been a lifetime in coming to terms with it, and I am only now embracing it fully. I still have my skeptical moments, but I have learned so much through speaking with others who are also sensitive. You, my dear, have ability. I can feel it, even through online contact. I do think that you push it away **because** you don't want to think of yourself as gullible. Again, me too. But it is a limitation you have set for yourself, and while you may think of it as your nature, you can overcome it.

 

 But Which Book?

 (3-14-11)

 My aunt told me on Facebook that she had a dream about me. I got sick, and didn't get to ask her until last night what her dream was. Here is her reply: 

YES, my dream was very sweet. We were talking about a book you wanted to write and I told you Patrick says write the book! Then I woke up. That is when I told you he was back. 

Are you thinking about writing? OR are you writing? If so, finish it. ha!


He’s like a Genie

 

 I realized something else. In the past, especially when I had zero faith that he and I could ever communicate well on our own, I always said it’d be so much easier to find answers if only my sister would listen to him. (My sister has mediumistic abilities, no question. She just chooses not to use them since it’s too much to handle when coupled with family and career).

But I realized this morning that Patrick must know about this b/c I’ve had at least three dreams where my sister is telling me things that Patrick said. (In one dream she even showed me a facial expression Patrick often displayed. Lol!) I think it’s way of ‘granting my wish’ so-to-speak with my sister helping us communicate.

That reminds me of how I’ve always said I wished I had a really well done Spirit Drawing of him. Not long after I voiced that, someone posted their Spirit Art to a forum I used to frequent. Every month or so they’d do a spirit drawing and then ask us to post our thoughts on what it might be trying to tell us.

Sooo......

I say that I wish my sister would help us communicate, so Patrick makes due with having her appear in my dreams a few times as a medium.

 I say I wish I had a Spirit Drawing of him, so Patrick makes due with that drawing someone did on that forum a while back. (That drawing wasn’t of him, by the way, but I think he saw the feather hat as the closest he was going to get. Lol! I say this b/c Nat and I were always laughing about a silly feather cap she said he wore a lot).


But it’s so sad! 



On a forum someone posted a spirit drawing, asking people what they think the spirit in the picture was thinking. (Oddly enough, her name was Layla and that week Mom kept hearing the name “Laoina” and then she met a “Laylona” at my grandpa’s funeral. Of course, that was all just coincidence but I thought it a little strange b/c Layla/Laoina/Laylona is such an uncommon name).

My guess on the picture was this -

 I think she's very sad, but resigned. I think she has a very strong will to go on, yet the sadness she feels will always be a part of her and she knows that. She has no choice but to live with that pain forever. 

Or maybe I'm just a hopeless tragedist.

 I was told that I had her essence correct, but I’m now wondering if my interpretation has something to do with that past life with Patrick? My friend hadn’t even done that reading yet when I posted my interpretation of the picture.

I guess I really do subconsciously remember that PL with (or without I guess I could say) Patrick, hence my interpretation of the spirit drawing?

Or perhaps this was all confirmation; his way of making me pay attention.


We’re the Same
(Feb 16, 2007)

 

I really don’t believe in horoscopes but sometimes read them for fun. How's this for a funny one?

“Your partner is your ‘mirror’ now. How you see them are YOU somehow.” 

The first part of it could echo the twin flame theory, not to mention that dream I had a while back with the tarot cards; with ME sitting on top PATRICK'S horse. That I am Patrick, and he's me.

I've even had a dream where I was sitting next to the bathroom mirror when my brother of all people told me “You ARE him.”

I'm still trying to wrap my mind around that idea, although I must admit most of the time I try to ignore it. I don’t think I'll ever truly understand, so why ponder on it too much?

 Of course, it could be nothing but if there's one thing I've learned this past year it's to be open minded.


Remember 
(May 2007)

 

I wasn't even going to mention this, but a few days ago (on May 16th) I wrote this down:

In Old Town Spring, a day or two before my birthday I guess, I was in one of Mom’s and mine’s favorite little shops. I noticed inside a basket were books. There was a division in the middle of the stack, and the exposed book cover was a red hardcover titled “You CAN Remember.”



The “Can” in the title was in caps or underlined, I think. Of course, it’s obviously a book about studying and retaining memory. At the time I thought to myself how neat it would be if seeing THAT book was a message that I really can remember snippets of that life on my own if only I’d give it a fair chance.

Well a couple days later I was looking at MySpace pages when I saw the title “Remember Me” inside someone’s blog. The lyrics to the song echo the possible message/sign of that book from a few days ago.



But what makes me REALLY WONDER about it not being just a coincidence is the time they posted it. They posted it at 10:21 pm. So there are those soulmate numbers again that I'm always seeing.

And then there's the automatic writing from him which read:

"How I wish you would remember me! I try to WILL IT, but it seems to be beyond my power."


Reading Auras

 

I stumbled across this today, and I had completely forgotten about it.

On a forum I used to visit, one time a forum member wanted to practice reading auras. (Or something like that. Like I said, it was some time ago). All you had to do was send a photo of yourself. (I believe mine was the pic I posted at the beginning of this blog. It’s the only photo I have. Lol!)

This is what they wrote back to me:

“I see green around you. Healing calming green. I see a tent and hear music. I see you gazing at the stars. I see a fun and relaxing time with people you love being with.”



 I just remembered that when I first read that, I figured they were talking about the future.  I say this because at that time we were either getting ready to move to the country, or had just then made the move out here to the country.  What I do know for certain is that during that time my mother and I were discussing having a family reunion here one day; since we now have the outdoor space for one.

But--- knowing what I do now, about Patrick and that past life, I find what they said pretty interesting. I find it interesting because ---

1). Blue, and certain shades of green, are my favorite colors. (Although my mother has said before that my aura is a shade of silvery/indigo. It was back then at least).

2). I had that ‘Tent Dream’ with Patrick and have always suspected that in that past life I might have traveled for part of it.

3). The mention of music and people calls to me because in one dream that I had, my house was one of those that’s inside an actual hillside. In that dream there were people e-v-e-r-y-w-h-e-r-e and everyone was always so cheerful and uppity. In this dream I realized that none of us were rich. We didn’t own much, but our entire community that we had going on was more than we even needed. We didn’t lack for anything.

4). They mentioned me gazing at the stars, and in this life I’m obsessed with looking at the stars. (I’ve even had loads of ‘space dreams’ over the years. To read them, just visit my Dreams blog). Not only that, but in that Automatic Writing Patrick said - “We often looked at the heavens and wondered at them. I still remember it well.”

 

I had originally thought they were talking about the family reunion we were thinking of having here at our house one day, but maybe they were talking more about the past?



Patrick's Features



This is what writers block does to a person! They type up notes for a synopsis to another story they've written, decide its crap and then attempt to finish their newest story. They stare at a blinking cursor for several minutes... with music from POTO playing softly in the background... then babble nonsense on a blog that hardly anyone even knows about.

All I have for Chapter 31 is a title and a few random notes, so instead of staring blankly at a screen and losing circulation in my hands, I'll just ramble inside here.

The other night, when watching Ghost Hunters on tv, I told Mom I’d love to have a Spirit Drawing of Patrick one day. She closed her eyes and pictured him herself. It was kind of funny because she answered a question that I’d been having, and we never discuss Patrick.

She saw his face as chiseled with rugged lips (which I had already told her), and sort of high cheekbones and a square chin (which is what I had been wondering about and thought that he had; esp. the square chin). She said she thinks he might have a high brow. She wasn’t sure though, as his hair was covering it.